I have never been the most patient person. For as long as I can remember I’ve wanted things done on my watch- as fast and efficiently as possible. That’s a high bar to set, whether I’m standing in line at the grocery or collaborating with someone on a project. And in the end, the frustration and dissatisfaction always hurts me the most.
My impatient tendencies are something I became acutely aware of in recent years, the main source likely being my relationship/ living with someone else. It’s not a trait I want to carry around with me forever, so it’s been good to work on letting go a bit more and accepting things that are not within my control. I try to focus on those feelings just as much as when I’m on the subway and people are moving like molasses to get out, or I’m waiting on an email response from a colleague and what seems to me to be a reasonable time to reply is not the same for them. That’s ok, everyone’s got their thing (say it with me now!).
But what about practicing patience when it comes to not knowing? For the first few years after of college, I felt perpetually frustrated by the fact that I wasn’t crystal clear on what I wanted to do with my life. I can recount numerous times where I thought to myself, if someone just tells, I’ll do exactly what it is! Just tell me! I was dying for a formula. With each new job I felt some relief, but it quickly faded. That relief became a bit stronger when I ventured out on my own at the end of last year, but now I face a new challenge: practicing patience when it comes to the unknowns of working for myself and running a business. And boy are there a lot! Did I make the right decision? Am I going about things the right way? Will my work pay off? Will I be successful? The “what ifs” are endless.
The best solution I’ve found thus far is focusing on taking things day by day. I can’t control how a conference call is going to go tomorrow or how a meeting is going to pan out next week- all I can do is focus on the work I do today, and making sure it’s my best. Aside from that, I’m also starting to realize that perhaps no one ever really “knows” and creating work you love is just a matter of consistently trying new things, taking risks, becoming aware of one’s strengths, and focusing on taking control of only what you can in the present moment.
Do you ever struggle with impatience or your inability to control something? Please tell me I’m not the only one! Have you found any methods that work for you when it comes to letting go? I’d so love to hear.
Photo Credit: Andrew Pile- an outtake from this shoot!
YES! I’ve been struggling a lot with the “what ifs” lately and having to reevaluate my plans for the future because I’m just not sure I’m going to be able to make things happen as quickly as I thought. These past couple of weeks have been a huge lesson for me that running your own business requires a lot of trust in yourself, and that you can only do what you can and know that if you make a mistake, you can learn from it and move on. The thing that has helped me the most with my impatience is stepping back and giving myself credit for just how far I have come. It’s easy to get caught up in the “what’s next” and forget what you have already accomplished.
That’s so true! I’m constantly caught up in what’s next or thinking about how I can be better- I so easily forget about everything I’ve already done. I also have a tendency to let me latest experience color all my feelings about my business. If something really good happens I feel great, but if something goes wrong then I see everything as a disaster. It’s something I definitely have to work on!
Clara, thanks for writing about this, because this is something I’ve been struggling with on a daily basis since starting my own company! Letting go of what will happen has been the hardest part. I’m excited about what’s to come, but it’s scary and somewhat out of my control. Daily I have to tell myself to let it go and know that I’ve done my best, be satisfied with my decisions, learn from my mistakes and just keep moving. One more thing…I LOVE reading your posts and trying out your recipes
Aaaw well I’m glad you can relate. You’re certainly not alone! I hope everything is going well- so glad you like the recipes!